


Together

by hotchnerslut



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Abuse, Age Difference, Alcohol, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Couch Cuddles, Cutting, Dark, Dubious Consent, Eating Disorders, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Friendship, Groping, Heavy Angst, Hurt Aaron Hotchner, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jack doesn't exist, Kidnapping, Kissing, Loss of Virginity, Non-Consensual Groping, Oral Sex, Past Abuse, Porn, Porn With Plot, Protective Aaron Hotchner, Rape, Rape/Non-con Elements, Self-Harm, Sex, Smut, So much angst, Suicide Attempt, Underage Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:42:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27166759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotchnerslut/pseuds/hotchnerslut
Summary: Aaron Hotchner meets a young girl one day after they both get kidnapped. Will this lead to a new relationship or end in sadness?
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Original Female Character(s), The BAU Team/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 20





	1. Captured

**Author's Note:**

> TW- NON/DUB CON, UNDERAGE. Please don't read if any of these (or any of the tags) bother you. Also, my first time writing! Please leave constructive criticism in comments! I'd love to hear what ya'll think. :)

After work, Aaron Hotchner walked over to the cupcake bakery just a few miles from the BAU headquarters. After eating and indulging on sweet snacks, he decided to take the shortcut through the alleyway to his car. As he was walking through the darkness in his suit, he suddenly felt a sharp pain and went unconscious. 

Waking up groggily, he saw he was in a dark musty room. He thought he must be in a warehouse or an old basement. Laying on a bare mattress in the corner of the room was a young girl, gag in her mouth and a dirty oversized t-shirt with equally dirty shorts. She was about 17-18 and tiny. She had medium length dark brown hair with two lighter highlights. 

His first instinct was to run over and try to help her but as soon as he tried standing up, he heard the click of a gun. 

He held his breath and slowly turned around. He saw a man around his 30-40’s wearing a black bandana around his nose and mouth holding a gun to his abdomen. 

At the same time, the girl woke up. As she opened her eyes, she realized that there was a man there. Her first thought was that her captor had brought a partner along with him. But as she examined him and saw a gun pointed at him she realized he too was here against his will.

When Aaron realized that the only door was blocked by the big man, he finally spoke up “What do you want?” The man holding them captive put his gun back in his shorts and pulled down his mask. With a deep voice like he had been smoking for way too long, he answered “Go over to the mattress.” pointing his finger at the obviously scared girl. Taking a closer look at her while he walked over, Aaron realized that her eyes were swollen from crying and that she had dark red marks all around her wrists like she had been bound. Her hair was messed up and from what he gathered, she had been here at least a few months. The look in her eyes was pure terror and fear. She was shaking and glanced up at him only for a split second before hanging her head back down. 

“Poor thing she must be scared out of her mind” he thought. 

After getting to the bed, he sat down on the floor right beside it. “Now take her clothes off.'' At this moment he realized what was going to happen. Refusing to do such a vile thing to an innocent (and obviously way younger) girl, he stood up and refused. The man was clearly out of control. But at the same time he was the one with a deadly weapon. Yelling and getting angrier, he grabbed his gun and boomed “Do it or i'll shoot her in the leg.” 

Aaron was sweating at this point. Turning around to the young girl and bending down, he gently reached his hands out offering her assistance in standing up. She accepted his help but while she was slowly standing up, he could feel her nervousness as her arms and hands were shaking.

Slightly turning his head, he could see that the gun was being pointed right at him. The man was getting impatient. “Get on with it. Undress her.” looking into her eyes, Aaron whispered under his breath “I’m so sorry,” as he lifted her shirt up. He could hear her breath shuddering at the coldness she suddenly felt without her shirt. Throwing her shirt down, he bent down on his knees and pulled her shorts down her legs. looking at the evil man, he realized he had to remove her undergarments in order to spare her from getting shot. His own hands were shaking as he had to pull down a barely 18 year old’s underwear. He could see she was trimmed but not shaved. When he stood up and looked at her preparing himself to take off her bra, she muttered “Please don’t.” her head was hung and she looked utterly ashamed and humiliated. 

After what he decided was too long, the kidnapper yelled at them to get on with it. At this point the young girl was tearing up and looked like she was about to crack. Aaron reached his arms around her barely needing to since he was already looming over her. compared to her , he was a giant. while he was 6”2 and fit, the small girl was only 4”11 and skinny. unclasping her bra, he saw that her breasts were small and perky. Trying to distract himself, he turned around and asked the man what was going to happen next. 

He felt powerless which was something he didn’t usually feel as he works for the FBI. “Next, strip him.” the girl who had already sat back down, got up and started unbuckling his belt. After her small hands took off the belt, she pulled down his pants only to see a giant bulge in his underwear. Pulling down his white boxers, his dick fell out. She opened her eyes in terror as he looked like he was at least 8 inches right now. standing up, they both realized since he was so much bigger, he had to lean down in order for her to pull his shirt over his head. Both now completely naked turned around to look at the man. 

“I'm leaving the room but I will be watching through security cameras. you know what you have to do next. Remember. I’m watching. ” The poor girl looked terrified as she bent down and slowly held the tall man’s dick in her tiny hands. 

With eyes big, she slowly wrapped her plump lips around his cock. As she started bobbing her head back and forth and twisting her hands around the base, he couldn’t help but groan. He could feel her humming around his dick which only got him harder. He felt disgusting for getting turned on by such a young girl compared to him but couldn’t deny that she looked so good like this. After a while, his balls tightened, he couldn’t hold it in and came in her mouth. She was unprepared as she suddenly tasted a warm thick liquid in the back of her throat. Almost gagging on it, she took the dick out her mouth and stood up with cum spilling out her mouth. Trying to swallow it, he told her she was doing a great job and that he was sorry. “You don’t have to apologize. this wasn’t your fault.” 

Next, he picked her up cradle style and laid her down on the mattress. Opening up her legs, he hesitantly started to eat her out. First he gently lapped her wet pussy causing her to mewl. After she got accustomed to it, he began licking her folds and licking stripes along her clit. she was squirming and panting. He sucked on her and slowly inserted his tongue into her. She squealed but was held down by his large gentle hand on her stomach. This seemed to calm her down. He could feel that her orgasm was starting to build up and as she moaned, he bent up and kissed her. This was a passionate kiss filled with moaning and panting. 

She bucked her hips up and as she accidentally ground against his length, he groaned from the friction. Next, to prepare her for what was happening next, he asked permission to finger her to which she agreed. After he stuck one finger up, she moaned and started grinding into his fingers. As more fingers were inserted all she could do was grind under him and moan even louder. When he took his fingers out, he brought them up to her mouth where she sucked all the liquid from them. He then put his own fingers into his mouth and enjoyed the taste of her saliva. 

Here came the last step. He had to take a young girl’s virginity. 

Slowly he rubbed his shaft up and down at the entrance of her vagina. Looking at her, he asked “Are you ready?” she nodded and said “I trust you.” This made him melt. Slowly he pushed his now hard 10 inch cock into her. As it was going in, he could see her wincing and obviously in pain. she was sweating and moaning now. She was grabbing his arm so tight that he thought there would be marks the next day. After five minutes of going slowly in and out, she was starting to enjoy it and felt pleasure ripple throughout her body. They started picking up the momentum while he went a little harder and a little faster with each thrust. She was so tight and her walls hugged his cock so tight that he was about to come right there. After ten minutes, he was basically pounding into her, she was moaning as loud as she possibly could and he was groaning with each push. The only sound in that room was skin slapping each other and moaning and panting. She looked into his eyes and managed to moan out “I'm going to come.” “Me too baby.” she liked him calling her that. After a few sloppy thrusts, she came, her eyes rolled back, and rode out her orgasm on his dick. Only a few seconds later he pulled out and she opened her mouth to have it filled with his cum. He collapsed on top of her and both were a pile of panting bodies. She grabbed him tight and finally felt warm. 

Seeing as the door was unlocked, they gathered and put on their clothes and since she was too sore and exhausted to walk, he carried her out. Seeing the sleeping man, Aaron grabbed his gun and shot him in the head. Leaving him laying there dead, they escaped the warehouse and walked for thirty minutes back to Aaron's car. When they got there, he asked her what her name was and where she lived so he could drop her off. she was obviously shaken and still scared but still managed to reply. “My name is Kaylee. i don’t have anywhere to go. I was taken while I was running away from my home. it wasn’t safe there.” her voice was trembling and her eyes were blank. After hearing this he offered to take her back to his place. He had a good job and a big house but lived alone. During the drive home he kept thinking 

“Kaylee is such a beautiful name.”


	2. Introductions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last part, Kaylee and Aaron met. What will this lead to in the future?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW- Mentions of rape and abuse. Hello! New chapter, I'll try to update once or twice a week since I already have around 10 chapters written :)))) Also kinda short chapter sorry lol. Enjoy!

After hearing that the young girl had nowhere to stay, Aaron offered to bring her to his place. He had a good job, a big house and lived alone after his divorce. When they arrived twenty minutes later, he showed Kaylee a big room he had and showed her where his master bedroom was just in case she needed him. He told her she could take a shower and he’d go out to buy her new clothes. In the shower, Kaylee could feel her captors hands all over her body as she relived the first few days she was there alone. He kept chaining her up and would touch her everywhere. She felt violated and humiliated the whole time. He would grope her and kiss her before beating her and leaving her without food or water for hours. 

She tried to take a fast shower and went back to her room to see new bags of clothes on her bed. She wasn’t used to receiving new things as at her house the only things she ever got were the things she stole to survive. After putting on pajamas, she tried to get sleep as it was already midnight. 

After all this, she was weak everywhere. In the mind and in the body. Every time she closed her eyes she would see and feel hands reaching for her in places she never wanted them. After a few restless hours, she walked across the hall to Aaron's room. Trying not to scare him, she lightly shook his shoulder. He was shirtless and wearing boxers. He turned around groggily and was surprised to see her there. After explaining why she couldn’t sleep, he lifted his blanket to invite her to sleep next to him. She felt safe but still couldn’t sleep. She also couldn’t get the feeling of her orgasms out of her head.That was the first time she had felt that sensation since growing up, she was always quiet and reserved. Kaylee slowly reached down into her underwear hoping not to wake Aaron and starting rubbing herself. She felt so good but had to cover her mouth with her hands to suppress her moans. After a while, she accidentally let out a loud groan which woke him up. Aaron was startled to wake up to the sight of Kaylee touching herself right next to him but at the same time he couldn’t help but get hard. “Don’t be embarrassed. I get it, everyone has needs. ” she then lifted the blanket while he slowly reached into her underwear. She moaned instantly at his touch. He could feel how wet she already was which turned him on so bad. She orgasmed and he took out his fingers and she moved closer to him. After this, they fell asleep, her head was laying on top of his chest and her two legs were wrapped around one of his. 

The next morning, she woke up on his chest and felt sick. Running to the bathroom, she threw up and couldn’t stop. He woke up and instantly knew something was wrong. Aaron ran over to her and began trying to comfort her. Kaylee explained that she had dreams of the man again and that she didn’t feel too good. After everything was settled, he decided to take her swimsuit shopping to go swimming. At the store, she picked out a yellow basic bikini and wanted to go try it on. When Kaylee stepped out of the dressing room, she looked embarrassed and asked if he liked it, “I love it.” this statement was enough for them to buy it. At the neighborhood pool, Aaron sat on a lawn chair while he saw Kaylee talking to some people around her age. this was when he realized that this was the first time he’s ever seen her smile. After a while, she was resting by the side of the pool with her head and arms on the concrete. He came over to her but as soon as he put his hand on her back, she flinched and jumped. “I’m sorry I was surprised.” 

“Don’t be sorry.” He realized that every time anyone made any sudden movements at her, she would flinch but he never had the time to ask her why. 

A few days later when she was at least more comfortable with him than she was when they first met, he decided to ask her while they were laying in his bed. She was nearly asleep so he figured he should just ask her. “Did something happen to you in the past?” 

“What? i don’t know what you’re talking about.” she was obviously avoiding his question.

“I mean in the past, was there anyone who ever hurt you?” At this statement, her breathing hitched. “W-why are you asking me this right now.” she looked up at him with nervous eyes like she was hesitant to answer him. “It’s just every time I raise my hands or try tapping you, you always flinch. I just want to know what happened so I can help you.” with tears forming in her eyes, she started nervously shaking again but mustered an answer “U- um at my house my mom has had anger issues ever since my dad left. She hits me when she gets angry. It’s ok though. I’m ok” she tried to force a smile which only came out as a small grin. He could tell that she wasn’t okay as tears started rolling down her cheeks. He pulled her into a warm hug and for the first time in a while, she felt safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Feel free to give any constructive criticism!! <3


	3. Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An important talk takes place between Aaron and Kaylee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW- ABUSE. Hi guys new chapter! :) Some angst but fluff towards the end.

After two weeks of living together, Kaylee slowly started getting more comfortable with Aaron. They would sleep together in the same bed because Kaylee often had nightmares that ended up with her sweating and screaming in the middle of the night. 

She no longer flinched when he made sudden movements or when there were loud noises. The only thing she realized was that after stressful days at the BAU, he would come home to drink. A lot. This caused him to get angry and frustrated most nights. If she was being honest, he scared her sometimes. But he never once took it out on her but instead shut himself in the bedroom to contain his anger.

One morning, Aaron opened his door after hearing a knock. 

Opening it, he saw a fairly tall woman dressed in a dark blue blouse and a skirt. “Hello I need to inform you that Kaylee Nguyen has to go back to her guardians house due to court orders.” 

“What? No. She can't. It’s not safe for her there” “I’m sorry sir but these are my orders. I can either take her now or you can bring it up in court.” 

“What? Who is that?”

He turned around and saw Kaylee standing above them on the stairs. Her eyes were starting to water and she asked “Where is she taking me? I- I don’t want to leave.” Kaylee ran into Aaron's arms and held onto him tightly. Aaron couldn’t stand watching her in pain like this. “She’s 17 can’t she move out on her own?” “I’m afraid not, you’ll have to wait until she is 18.” he looked over at her solemnly “It’s ok, it’s only one month I’ll try to get you out of there. but in the meantime, we can call everyday and you can see me on the weekends. But you have to go. now.” “O- ok.” 

After she got packed, Kaylee followed the lady to her car with tears rolling down her face. When she got there, they called almost everyday. But as the first weekend came by, the calls got shorter and almost always ended abruptly. By the time Friday came, she didn’t even pick up his calls.

Four days later when he pulled up to the front of her mom’s house and rang the doorbell, she opened the door, walked out in a plain cropped t-shirt and jeans and immediately jumped into his arms burying her face in his neck. He wasn’t expecting it but smiled and even blushed. She immediately smelt and recognized the faded cologne that he always wore and smiled into his neck. They walked to his car where they drove back to his house. On the way, he kept looking to his side seeing her hold her left arm and he thought he even saw a glint of nervousness in her eyes. Hoping to break the silence, he asked “Why did you stop calling me?” She hinted at the slight pain in his voice and replied with “Oh I'm sorry I just got caught up with school work but I'm fine.” He looked like he didn’t believe her but didn’t keep pressing. 

When they were home, they sat in the living room watching TV. While he reached over trying to grab the remote, he saw her flinch, slightly turning her head the opposite way and immediately shielding her cheek with her two hands. His eyes widened. “Did you just flinch? I’m sorry I was just reaching for the remote “Oh uh- I’m- I'm sorry I didn’t mean to” she didn’t even look in his eyes. He pulled her closer and wrapped his arms all around her. She buried her face in his chest and he felt his shirt getting wet. He pulled her off “Kaylee are you ok?”

“No. Aaron, she hit me again.”

“Who, your mom?”

“Yeah, I- I stopped calling you because she said I couldn't. She was angry at me for leaving. She said it was all my fault. Maybe she was right and I deserved it. It was irresponsible to try running away.” Kaylee was now sobbing as he held her, feeling her shaking body pressed against his. He frowned as he noticed she was even lighter than before. “Kaylee have you been eating?”

“N- no. I can’t eat when I’m not with you. I just don’t feel like it.” her head hung.

“It’s ok hon. Come on, I'll carry you to the kitchen and we can get something to eat alright?” he scooped her up and she gave a small giggle. He returned it with a warm smile and brought her to the kitchen and set her down on a stool.

“What do you want to eat? Want some soup?”

“Uhh sure, but a small portion please.”

“Alright.” Aaron microwaved some soup in a small bowl and handed it to her. She took small sips out of her spoon and smiled at him. “Come on Kaylee, have some more” “I’m not that hungry Aaron.” 

He took the spoon and fed her himself which resulted in her finishing the whole bowl. After he cleaned up the kitchen, they headed to the living room couch that was way too big for two people. “Hon can I see your arm?”

“Oh it’s not even that serious Aaron. Really. I can barely feel it.”

“Please. I thought we could trust each other.” as she nodded and gave him nervous permission, Aaron pulled up her sleeve and saw a large bruise from her wrist to forearm. She couldn’t read his eyes. It looked like disappointment, sadness, and anger all in one. ‘Aaron?”

He looked up and held her face in his large hand. His singular hand could’ve easily covered her whole face. “Kaylee why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve helped you through my connections.” his voice broke and it was now his turn to hang his head. “I’m so sorry. I just didn’t want you to worry about me. You’ve already taken me in and given me a place to live.” 

“I would do anything for you Kaylee. I love you.”

“W- wait what?”

“I’m sorry. It’s too fast I know. You don’t have to feel pressured to say it ba-”

“I love you too Aaron.” She gave him a bright smile that made him forget about everything else. He forgot about the stressful murder cases he dealt with everyday, he forgot about his anger and stress. All that took up his brain right now was her. She was perfect. She was perfect with her big eyes that stared up at him adoringly. She meant the world to him. He would even kill anyone who tried to harm her. And he meant it.

After their heartfelt and tearful but very needed talk, they walked upstairs to his bedroom. He got ready for bed by undressing into his boxers. Kaylee put on a light cream colored sweater and sweatpants.They walked to the bathroom together and brushed their teeth as well as washed their face. Kaylee washed her face and as soon as she felt the cold fresh water splash on her face, she felt happy. This was the first time she had felt truly happy in a long time. As she climbed into the bed beside him, he pulled the blanket over her and kissed her on the forehead. She snuggled even closer to him and mumbled “Love you.” before falling deep asleep. Before dosing off to sleep, Aaron started planning in his head his surprise for Kaylee tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! This definitely wasn't my favorite chapter haha. But say anything you'd like in the comments! <333


	4. Hello

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron has a surprise for Kaylee. How will the day end?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry guys. My mental health has been extremely bad for the past few days and I'm just overall tired mentally and physically. Hope you enjoy this chapter. I will be trying my hardest to update again this week for the few people who have been keeping up with this story; please forgive me if it doesn't happen.

In the morning, Kaylee groggily woke up to an empty bed. Looking over to the other side of the room, Aaron was already up and dressed in his usual suit. He was putting on socks when he noticed her wake up. “Good morning sleepyhead.” She grinned and walked over to him pulling him into a bear hug. Aaron let go and held her face adoringly. “Today I want you to come with me to the BAU so I can introduce you to my coworkers.” Hotch said with a big grin. Kaylee agreed and quickly got ready as she didn’t want him to be late because of her. She was surprisingly nervous as she had only heard stories of them and had never actually met them. She was a bit scared as they were all older than her but she would do anything for him. 

On the way to work, Aaron's hand was over Kaylees thigh the whole ride. When they got there, he noticed she was shaking and looked at her. “You’re perfect. Everyone will love you as much as I do.” 

Nervously, she walked with him inside the building. Hotch came in and told JJ to gather everyone at the round table. When everyone got there, they found Aaron sitting there with a young girl next to him. “Hotch who’s this young lady?” said Morgan. He was the first one to speak. “Everyone, this is my girlfriend Kaylee. I wanted to introduce her to you guys.” The two girls JJ and Emily ran over to her and shook her hand. “Hi, this is Emily and I’m Jennifer. You can call me JJ. You're gorgeous! A bit young though! What are you doing with a grandpa over there?” Kaylee giggled nervously and blushed. 

JJ whispered to Emily, “I haven’t seen Hotch smile like this since.. well since Haley.” “Yeah. She’s definitely made him happier than any of us could’ve.”

Aaron was right. They were nice and super welcoming. Garcia came running in and when she saw her, she scooped her up and exclaimed “How adorable! I’m Penelope!” her hug was tight. She couldn’t breathe. “Put her down sugar!” said Morgan. He reached his hand to her, “I'm Morgan. Derek Morgan.” he said kissing the top of hand. “Alright Morgan. Enough.” Aaron said. “He was getting way too close to her,” Aaron thought. Next was David Rossi. He gave her a polite smile and gestured to Aaron to follow him. 

Hopefully he wasn’t in trouble for bringing her here. That was the last thing she wanted. The only person left in the room who she hadn’t talked to was a young man with brunette hair. He wasn’t much older than her. “I- hi I’m Spencer Reid.” he said with a shy smile. She instantly felt comfortable with him and returned his greeting with “I’m Kaylee.”

In David's office where he had pulled Hotch into, they were having a deep conversation. “Hotch. She’s so young! What are you doing with her?” “David, I hope you aren’t implying that I’m taking advantage of her. She might be younger but that doesn’t mean anything.” “Alright fine bossman. I just wanted to make sure you guys are happy” he said with a smile. “Thank you.”

Hotch quickly walked out of Rossi’s office with Rossi following behind. Aaron greeted Kaylee wrapping his arm around her waist as she sighed and leaned into him. 

Emily decided to break the silence and asked “So how did the two lovebirds meet?”

Everyone in the room was once again met by silence as Kaylee’s smile disappeared from her face. All eyes were now on her which was just making the situation worse. She didn’t know what to do so she did what she always did. She ran out of the room crying.

“Oh my goodness. Aaron I’m sorry I didn’t know she’d react like that. I wasn’t trying to hurt her feelings.” Emily was now profusely apologizing to Aaron. “Don’t worry Emily. You’re fine.” Hotch now had that stone cold expression on his face that the team saw everyday. 

Spencer decided to run after Kaylee. “Maybe I can see what’s wrong guys. I mean we are around the same age.” He looked over to Hotch waiting for approval and when Hotch gave a small nod, he headed out of the floor to find Kaylee sitting on a large sofa in the lobby of the massive building. He tapped her quickly on the shoulder which caused her to yelp and jump. “Hey Kaylee, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you.” “Oh no it’s no problem.” She sniffed and wiped the wet tears from her face with her arm. “Um are you ok? Emily wasn’t trying to offend you or Hotch in any way.” “Oh no I feel so bad now. It wasn't her fault. The question just kind of caught me off guard.” Spencer suddenly noticed the bruising around her wrists that were now a dark purple mixed with yellow color. He sat next to her and asked “Uh hey what happened with your wrists?” She was stunned and didn’t know how to answer but suddenly told him. She didn’t know why she just told someone she had just met an hour ago about the most traumatic thing that's ever happened to her. As she told the story, she of course left out the part where she and Aaron were forced to have sex because she wanted to respect Aaron. After telling Spencer the whole story (most of it), she started bawling and fell into his arms. He held her until he saw Aaron emerge from the elevator. Aaron walked over there with his obvious authority and nodded to Spencer. 

“Thank you Reid, but I can handle it from here.” Spencer gave him a small smile as he let go of her and made his way back up to their designated floor. Kaylee looked up and sniffled as she saw Aaron looming over her. “Oh Aaron. I’m sorry. Did I embarrass you? I’m so sorry. Please don’t hit me. I’m sorry. I won’t do it again I promise.” she was hurryingly apologizing to Aaron. She thought back to her home. Everytime she did something wrong which was apparently everything, she would either receive a piercing slap across the face or would go days with barely any food. She couldn’t handle that again, she’d rather die.

Aaron was shocked and sat down next to her pulling her into a big hug and holding her as close as humanly possible. “Honey. You’re safe. I’m not going to hurt you. You’re here with me, I love you.” He felt relieved as her body relaxed against his. She mumbled “I’m sorry.” “Don’t be sorry baby. You didn’t do anything wrong. Do you want to head home now?” “Yes please.”

The ride home was silent except for the faint sound of the radio playing some other pop song.   
When they got home, she and Aaron were both exhausted and lay down in bed as soon as they could without changing out of their clothes. Kaylee fell asleep with Aaron’s arms around her and her head resting on his chest.

As she was falling asleep, Kaylee thought about today and reminisced about each encounter she had today. Morgan was flirty, (maybe a bit too flirty) Garcia was the sweetest person she had ever met, JJ and Emily were protective and reminded her of the mom she never had, Spencer was a good and loyal friend, and David was serious but understanding.

After meeting the team, she often came to work with Aaron and stayed back with Garcia when they had to fly out for cases. She was best friends with Spencer after both opening up to each other, and the girls were becoming some of her closest friends. David was still reserved but was always polite and a bit funny when he would make fun of Aaron. Derek was fun but she couldn’t shake the feeling that he always got a bit too close or would “accidently” bump into her.

Kaylee soon fell asleep to the quiet sound of Aaron’s soft breathing and the feeling of her face against his rough suit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for reading. I love reading your guys' comments, it makes my day.


	5. Please

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron hosts a party. What's going to be the outcome at the end of the night?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW- please read the tags and make sure you're okay with it! <3 Hi guys new chapter :) Longer but important.

Aaron was hosting dinner at his house and had invited over the team.

Aaron shouted from downstairs “Kaylee! I’m setting up the tables for tonight! Can you come down and help?”

Kaylee had been in bed all day; she called today her ‘lazy day.’ She decided it was time to get out of bed so she got ready, threw on an oversized crew neck and shorts, and headed downstairs to help Aaron prepare for guests. Over the past few weeks, Kaylee had actually grown quite fond of everyone. 

She loved visiting everyone at work and she even had a girls day with Emly, JJ, and Penelope the other day. They went to the mall and had a shopping spree. When Aaron picked her up from Emily’s apartment, he was surprised when she opened the door with about 7 bags in her hands and a beaming smile looking up at him. He loved seeing her happy and thanked the girls for giving Kaylee such a good day. That night, she was talking the whole ride home about how much fun she had and how that was one of the first times she had been to the mall and actually gotten to buy stuff. That night, Aaron made a mental promise to himself that he would definitely be going to take her shopping more often. 

Kaylee and Spencer also often went out for coffee at the local coffee shop. They would spend hours just drinking coffee and eating pastries while reading together and every so often peeking their heads out of their books to ask each other what time it was or what was happening in their books. Spencer often read science fiction and information books while Kaylee enjoyed fantasy and romance novels. 

When Kaylee got to the kitchen, Aaron walked over and scooped her into his arms with a big smile. He got so lucky with her. “Can you chill the wine?” Her face was still snuggled in the crook of Aaron’s neck and wondered what she would’ve done if they’d never found each other. Honestly, she would have probably been dead. Either killed by the kidnapper or herself. She stood in his arms for one more moment as she admired the way her head fit perfectly in the crook of his neck. “Sure.” Kaylee headed to his wine cellar filled with many bottles of exquisite choices. She grabbed one that she assumed would be fine to drink.

A couple hours later, everyone started arriving. Emily was the first to arrive. The rest of the team arrived shortly after. After dinner, they all headed to the living room where everyone had exchanged the expensive wine for cheap gas station beer. The only people who didn’t drink were Aaron and Derek. Kaylee and Aaron shared a quick look between them two that only they understood. His eyes were full of happiness while hers were secretly telling him how proud she was of him. He had been struggling with controlling his drinking and she had been trying her hardest to help him. Today was his 1 month mark of sobriety. 

Everyone was joking around and having fun while getting a bit tipsy. Kaylee had secretly already finished two glasses while Aaron had thought she was still on her first one. They were on the edge of the couch with Kaylee pressed into his body. Emily and Derek were sitting on the floor and Dave was on the armchair while everyone else was on the couch. He had started to notice her slurring her words and swaying so of course he had to intervene. He never wanted her to depend on something as dangerous as alcohol. “Kaylee, slow down on the drinks. You’ve had plenty tonight.” “Oh come on Hotch, let the girl live!” Said Dave. “Yeeahh H-otch let me livvve!” Everyone burst into laughter at her mocking Dave. Shit, even Dave was laughing. Aaron gently pulled Kaylee up from the couch so that she was leaning on him as they both stood up. “Alright hon, you’ve had way too many drinks. Kaylee, say goodnight to everybody!” “Ughh you’re nooo funn.” “Come on, please don’t make this difficult.” “Yees daddy!” This statement caused Aaron to immediately blush and everyone immediately turned their attention from Kaylee to Aaron. “Alright that's enough, up you go.” He scrambled her upstairs and as he was walking back down obviously flustered, she stood at the top of the staircase and stuck out two middle fingers towards him along with her tongue. As soon as he turned around, she hurriedly ran to their room and shut the door giggling. This was the first time he had seen her drunk and he bet himself it wouldn't've been the last. 

As he made his way down and started sweating a bit less, Emily slapped him on the back and chuckled. “She’s fun! Maybe she’ll teach you to have a little fun.” She said with a smirk. JJ had just left because she said it was Henry’s bedtime and Penelope left because “As much as I LOVE hanging out with my amazing team, Kevin’s waiting for me at home!” This resulted in everyone shooing Garcia out the door as she laughed. The only people left were Aaron, Dave, Emily, and Derek. They were all hypnotized by a deep conversation about a recent serial killer in Asia. Derek soon excused himself to go use the restroom.

Kaylee was laying in bed and was nearly about to fall asleep when she heard the doorknob open. “Aaron? Did everyone leave already?” No response. This was weird. Even though it was his bedroom, he’d always knock first. Instead of Aaron, it was Morgan who came in instead. “Oh uh, I wasn't really expecting you.” Instead of saying anything, Morgan reached over and locked the door. He walked over to her and covered her mouth with his hand. “Shhh don’t say another word baby girl.” She squirmed under his hand but couldn’t quite move with his weight looming over her. He was on top of her straddling her.

Please please please. She was silently begging. She knew what was about to happen. It couldn’t happen to her again.

After removing his hand, she begged. “Please don’t do this. I'm begging you. I won’t tell Aaron if you leave.” All Morgan did was take his tie and stuff her mouth with it. She was again whimpering and trying to get away but was no match against the man twice her age. He pinned her arms above her and with his other arm started furiously taking off his belt. After undressing, he started ripping her clothes off and handcuffed her hands together and to the bedpost using his belt. Kaylee was a mess underneath him. She was sobbing hysterically and her chest was heaving from the sobs racking her body.

No one was going to help her now. The party was downstairs and the room was upstairs all the way at the end of the hallway. Nobody could hear her. She could hear loud music now pounding from underneath her and loud conversations between drunk adults.

She was now naked and vulnerable on her own bed. The only other person who’d seen her like this was Aaron. Oh how she wished he was here. Derek pulled down his boxers to reveal his big length. Although it wasn’t as big as Aaron's it was still above average. Her eyes widened in terror and was shaking her head begging him not to do this. She was frantically trying to kick him but she was weaker than him and she had no coordination because of the many previous drinks she had earlier. He gave himself a big stroke groaning. He took a condom out of his pocket and frantically put it on.

“You look so beautiful.” He dug his fingers into her hips which would surely cause bruises and thrust into her. If she wasn’t gagged her scream would’ve shook the house. It hurt so bad. Pain was coursing through her whole body and she felt as if she was being ripped in half. She was definitely not prepared. The last time she and Aaron had sex was a month ago. He was almost always busy with work and while they spent time together they just never seemed to have time for sex. Nor did they care that much since it wasn’t the most important aspect of their relationship. “He doesn’t deserve you. God you’re so pretty like this.” Pulling out only to slam right into her again, he continued, “Fuck. I see the way he treats you. He dismisses you. He doesn’t treat you like you should be.” he continued slamming into her. He let out a low groan between each word. She whimpered as he caressed her whole body. He licked along her jawline and kissed her neck. He bent up to her face to lick the tears off her lips. He reached for her breasts and squeezed her nipples tightly together. Now, each thrust was getting sloppy and sloppier as he was reaching his climax. “Fuck. You don’t understand how hard I get everytime I see you, Kaylee.”

With a few more thrusts, he pulled out, slipped the condom off, and forced her mouth open coming inside. He was panting and kissed her neck. She let out a whimper as she felt his sperm leaking out of her lips. He kissed her on the forehead and left closing the door. He left her there lying on the bed alone. Naked. Shaking.

Kaylee didn’t know what to do. What was she supposed to do in this situation? She just got raped. My god she was raped. Again.

Curling up into a ball, she sobbed. That's the only thing she knew how to do. It felt like hours before she realized that sooner or later Aaron would be coming back. She grabbed a new pair of clothes and headed to the restroom. After changing and washing her puffy face, she spotted a first aid kit in the bathroom cabinet. Opening it, she found a small razor. She hadn’t self harmed in years. The scars on her thighs were barely visible but now all she could think about is how good it would feel. How good it would feel to not have to get her mind off of what had just happened.

She couldn’t overcome the temptation. Pressing the blade against her thigh until she drew blood felt like heaven with a slight trace of pain. She deserved it. It was probably her fault for not locking the door in the first place. Maybe a little pain felt good after all. She slowly pressed it and dragged it across her thigh. Watching the blood trickle down her leg was a sight that she could never resist. One cut led to another which led to another. After a while her whole right and left thighs were covered in bright red gashes. She showered and scrubbed her body as well as she possibly could. But no matter how long or hard she scrubbed, she still felt dirty. She could feel Derek's hands everywhere. Walking out of the shower, she put on dark colored sweatpants. Aaron couldn’t see this. He'd be disappointed in her. She didn’t want that. 

After a little while she realized all the guests had left and that Aaron was coming back upstairs. She climbed into the bed and pretended to be asleep. The heavy blanket rubbed against her thigh and she winced as Aaron was climbing into the other side of the bed. She would never tell him about what happened that night. It would break him. And after all he’s given her, she couldn’t bear to do that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah shit. I love Morgan don't get me wrong. But someone had to be the bad guy lmao. Next update will prob be on Monday or Tuesday :))) Thanks for reading! Please leave comments if there's anything you want to say!


	6. Sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emotional chapter surrounding Hotch and Kaylee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi ya'll. Sorry this is prob gonna be the only chapter this week. I haven't been feeling great but I just had the inspo to write all of a sudden so here :)

After the party, Aaron changed into boxers and climbed into bed gently trying not to wake Kaylee. She looked so calm lying there. She was curled up on the very edge of the bed. He browsed his phone for around ten minutes before falling asleep with his arms around her.

She no longer wanted to come with him to work which he thought was odd since she got along with everyone and usually seemed to enjoy it there. They still slept in the same room but she would always sleep all the way at the edge of their king bed. He didn’t want to force her to do anything she didn’t want to so every morning before leaving early in the morning, he gave her a kiss on the forehead and left. “Hon are you fine? I’ve just been noticing your off behavior lately.” Aaron looked at Kaylee with true concern in his eyes. Lately, she had been even quieter than when they first met. “I’m fine Aaron.” Kaylee quickly answered.

What he didn’t know was that she felt like dying.

Every morning was devastating. She wanted to fall asleep and never wake up. Sometimes when Aaron was gone for work, Derek would come in and rape her repeatedly. This went on for months. She wanted to tell Aaron, she really did. But she couldn’t take the chance. He would think that she was weak. She didn’t even have the strength to fight back anymore. She would just let him use her. After he left, she would shower and cut herself. Soon she had no space anymore. Her arms weren’t an option since Aaron could easily see them. Her thighs were running out of space.

“I can’t believe what a whore you are. Just letting me use you like this.” His words rang in her ear. He was right. She could’ve easily stopped this. But she didn’t. She was a coward.

When Aaron got back to the office from a three day trip to Georgia, he headed straight home to Kaylee. He didn’t know what had been going on with her lately so he decided they would go out to a nice restaurant. He was sure she’d like it since they hadn’t been out in ages. Walking in through the garage, he set his briefcase on the kitchen counter and headed upstairs to his bedroom where he saw her sitting on the edge of the bed. “Kaylee? What are you doing?” She turned her head around and looked at him with teary eyes. Her voice broke “Aaron? Y- you’re home early?” “Yeah.. what’s going on?” He was so confused. “Aaron please.. can you hold me?” She hung her head as she sat pitifully on the bed. He walked over to her and sat right next to her. He said nothing but instead pulled her into his chest. As soon as he rested his head on top of hers, he heard a sharp sob. He could nearly hear the pain captured in one cry. She was limp against him as sob after sob racked her body. He could smell the vanilla shampoo in her hair and did his best to savor the smell. This was all Kaylee needed. She longed for his touch the whole day. She couldn’t function anymore without him. 

Whenever he was gone for cases, she always tried her best not to be clingy but she couldn’t help it. Perhaps she had abandonment issues from her dad. Maybe she was just so in love with him that she couldn’t let him go. They fell asleep on the side of the bed entangled in each other's limbs

Later that night Aaron could hear her cry herself to sleep but every time he tried asking her she wouldn’t budge. “Please Kaylee. I can’t do this anymore. I have no idea what’s going on with you. I feel like I’m in the dark.” he stroked her cheek and lightly turned her face towards him. “I’m sorry. I just can’t.” At that, she turned her whole body around and went to sleep. She had to be distant and cold. It was the only way she could hide her pain from him. After her earlier ‘outburst’ she made up her mind. She would distance herself from him until he had no choice but to leave. She would only end up hurting him if he ever found out what his coworker had done to her.

She no longer wanted to go swimming with him or go out for walks. She wasn’t eating properly and could barely stomach a meal. She would assure him that she was just tired or not hungry. He knew this wasn't true. She would stay in bed all day just rolled up into the sheets.

A few days later after she heard Aaron leave for work, she walked into the restroom. Looking at her thighs, her eyes welled up with tears. She hated herself now. Her thighs were littered with fresh red scars and she could barely walk around without wincing and feeling the stinging sensation that was starting to feel a bit too familiar. But she needed the pain. She deserved it. With no more space on her legs, she just had to cut her arm. It was the only way she knew how to cope.

She pressed the blade into her wrist and dragged it across her wrist. Seeing the red blood ooze and spill out of her new wound made her feel calm. This was now the only thing in her life she had control over. 

She couldn’t stop now. It felt too good. With each scar it got deeper. The deeper she went the better it felt. Hopefully this time she really wouldn't wake up.

Aaron had just come back from a rather short day of work. They didn’t have a case and he wanted to get home early to spend time with Kaylee. They hadn’t had a lot of time together but he made time for her today. He knew she had been going through a lot.

“Kaylee?” He heard his voice echo through the big house. This was weird. She’d usually be in the living room watching her favorite shows or occupying herself. Maybe she was asleep or doing something upstairs. Walking upstairs he checked the bedroom. Nothing. He noticed the bathroom door was cracked the slightest bit open. 

Opening it, he found her lying on the floor. Eyes closed, covered in scars and blood on the floor. “Oh god oh god oh GOD.'' Aaron's heart was racing and tears were forming. He scooped her up gently and her eyes softly fluttered open.

“Aaron?” Her eyes stared right into his. “I love you so much. Thank you.” Her eyes were getting wet and she was grabbing his shirt pulling herself closer to him. He didn’t say anything as he lay her down on their bed. 

He grabbed a wet cloth and began gently wiping the blood off her thighs and arms. He choked out with a broken voice “What happened?” He threw the cloth down and a tear fell down his cheek and he shut his eyes. 

She had never seen him cry before. She couldn’t tell him. He would be ashamed of her and he wouldn’t love her anymore. How could he love her if he found out she had been molested countless times? She was dirty and filthy now.

“I'm so sorry Aaron. Please don’t hate me.” 

“I could never hate you. I just don’t understand why you didn’t feel like you could tell me about this.” 

She wanted to tell him. She really tried but the words couldn’t come out. It was as if she was just frozen. Her mouth was dry and it no longer worked to convey her messages across. She was so ashamed of herself. Now tears were quickly running down his cheek and this was her fault. She was such a coward that she ended up hurting him. She dug her fingers into her arms and legs opening up her cuts. Blood was pouring out and as soon as he saw her wincing and the blood, he grabbed her arms and pressed her palms against his chest. “Kaylee. Please. I need to know so I can help.” She was sobbing and was trying to pull him as close as she could. Her tiny body against his was racked with sobs and she was shaking.

“My god. Just kill me already. Just fucking let me die Aaron!”

She was trying to free her arms from his grasp but he was way stronger. 

He didn’t know what to do. How could he help her? She was covered in scars, blood, and tears. He felt useless and helpless. He could feel her shivering against his chest and did his best to hold her small body as tight as he could.

“P- please please promise me Aaron. Promise me you won’t hate me.”

Aaron's shirt was wet with her tears although he wouldn’t have been surprised if his were mixed in as well. They had been sitting there for thirty minutes now. He was trying his best to comfort her but how long could this possibly go on if he didn’t even know what had happened?

“Please baby. You need to let me know so I can help you.”

Her big eyes looked up at him. “I can't Aaron. You won’t forgive me. You would never forgive me.” This shattered his heart into pieces. 

“Of course I’d love you. You know nothing could change that.” 

“I- ,” her breathing hitched and she took a deep breath. “About two months ago at your party Derek came in here while everyone was downstairs and he-“ she couldn’t finish it. 

“He what,” Aaron's face suddenly went from a worried face to a stone cold straight stare.

“He- he raped me. And he’s been doing it for months now.” Kaylee saw the anger that flared up in Aaron's eyes and tensed. He had never hurt her. But what if this is what it took? “I’m sorry Aaron. I’ll understand if you don’t want to be with me anymore. I get it. I’m used. I’m fucking dirty now.” she was sobbing the loudest she had since this had started. He just looked down at her with suddenly horrified eyes. He had let Derek in so many times while he just left. If he had paid more attention then he would’ve realized this sooner.

Suddenly he stormed out and walked downstairs to retrieve his keys. Kaylee ran after him begging. “Please Aaron just don’t do anything stupid.” She grabbed his shirt. “Quit it. I have to go. He RAPED you for god's sake.” His facial expression was now angry and he pried her arms off from him. There was no sadness or worry anymore. Just anger. Kaylee knew he had a temper. “PLEASE Aaron. I'm begging you.” She reached up with both hands to cup his cheek only to feel a strong stinging in her own cheek as she realized he slapped her. She fell to the ground from the impact of the slap and the only thing helping her from banging her head was her wobbly arms which barely supported her. He was three times her age and twice her size.

Looking up with fearful eyes, she cupped her cheek and sat there with tears streaming down her face. She was shaking and had no words. He took one last emotionless look at her and left slamming the door. 

After he was gone, she sat there. Processing. Did he just hit her? He knew her past and he still managed to slap her across the face. She stood up on wobbly legs and limped to the bathroom. Looking in the bathroom mirror, she saw a gash across her cheek probably from the impact of the slap and the ring he wore. Wincing, she tried her best to clean it up using water and a towel. She could still see the red imprint of his hand across her cheek.

She stayed up all night waiting for him to come home. After hours of yawning and forcing her eyes to stay open, she fell asleep on the rough leather couch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Leave comments or thoughts if you want :) I like reading them lol. Bye <3


	7. I'm Fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What is going through Kaylee's head after the events last night?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys I'm sorry for not posting regularly. I've been swamped in work and I've just been going through a lot but I only have one more prewritten chapter before I start writing again :)

That morning, Kaylee woke up to see a text on her phone. She frantically sat up and hoped it was Aaron. It wasn’t. 

She had gotten a text from Spencer instead.

“Hey wanna get some coffee at 12?”

She replied with “sure. see u in a couple of hours.”

“Alright. See you there. Usual place.”

God, how she wished it was Aaron. Despite the fact that he had hit her, she still needed to know if he was ok. 

Twenty minutes before having coffee with Spencer, she decided to get changed. She wore mom jeans and a creamy white sweater to cover her arms and legs. She wore minimal makeup and put on some dangly earrings and a layered necklace.

On her way there, she kept calling Aaron hoping he’d pick up. Her eyes watered as she heard through the phone “This person's automating voice message box is full.”

She quickly wiped her tears off and was glad that she picked out waterproof mascara that morning. As she walked into the coffee shop, she saw Spencer stand up and wave with a big smile. She returned it with a more timid smile and quickly went to order a small iced coffee before sitting down with him.

"Hi Spencer, we haven't talked in a while!"

"Yeah what's up with that? You haven't been coming to the building for a while." he took a sip of his own coffee.

"Oh yeah about that. I've just been super tired lately.”

At that moment, he got a better look at her face and realized she had a giant gash on her cheek and her eyes were puffy. Perhaps from crying? As she walked up to the front he realized she was also limping and even winced when she had to pick up her coffee.

When she got back, she took small sips of her coffee.

“Hey Kaylee. You know you can tell me anything right? I'm your friend, I would never judge you and I just want what’s best for you.”

“Uh of course I know that. Why are you saying this?”

“Alright I’m just going to say it. Is Aaron hurting you in any way?” He knew his boss wouldn’t but he had to be sure. He really cared about Kaylee.

“Uh what? N- no no he’s not. He loves me. I love him. I just tripped and scratched my cheek. That’s all. It was my fault.”

“Ok I trust you.. just know you can always talk to me.”

“Um ok. I have to go now. But today was really nice. Thank you so much.” Kaylee gave him a hug and left. 

After Kaylee walked out, Spencer couldn’t help but realize that she had gotten so much skinnier from the last time he'd seen her. He opened the cap from her coffee to see that it was barely touched. He needed to talk to Aaron about this. Honestly, he did not think that Aaron would ever hurt her. He's known his boss for a while now and knows he isn’t a violent person.

Pulling out his phone, he dialed Aaron's number.

“Hello?”

“Hi Hotch. It's Spencer.”

“Oh hi, uhh why are you calling me on a Saturday? Is something wrong?”

“No nothing wrong. I just had coffee with Kaylee and she looked.. I don’t know. Different?” Something was definitely up with Aaron. Spencer was a skilled profiler and could tell his boss sounded nervous through the phone.

Oh shit. Spencer had to have seen the gash he left on her cheek last night. He didn’t mean to. honestly. He just got so angry and didn’t know what to do. It wasn’t that he was angry at her, he was just more angry at himself for not understanding her situation sooner. That night, Aaron had stayed at a friend's house. He was so ashamed that he couldn’t go home and face her. she was the love of his life and he had managed to do the only thing that would truly hurt her.

“Uhh what do you mean?”

“Come on man. She’s skinnier, she was limping, and she had a huge gash on her cheek. What the fuck happened?”

“It was me. It was my fault. I accidentally lost my temper with her last night.”

“WHAT THE HELL?” Spencer was now in his car and he was angry. How could she not tell him? How could Hotch do something like that? “Hotch what the fuck is wrong with you? I’m sure you know about her past. And you still did that?”

“i know. I fucked up. And now I can’t even return her calls because I’m a fucking coward. I don’t deserve someone like her. Let her know I’m sorry.” And he hung up.

When Kaylee got home, she collapsed at the doorway. Her knees buckled as she fell down and sobbed. Aaron still wasn’t home. She knew this must’ve been her fault. If she hadn’t been a fucking pussy then he would’ve been here. They would’ve been happy again. 

She solemnly walked to the kitchen with wet cheeks and puffy eyes. She desperately looked for something to eat.

Over the past few months she had eaten less despite the fact that she was already dangerously skinny from the start.

She didn’t have a particular reason as to why she never felt like eating. She just wasn’t hungry anymore. And now without Aaron; the only person who got her to eat full meals gone, she really didn’t see the point of nutritioning herself.

But now, Kaylee knew that she had to eat at least something. Looking in the fridge, she pulled out a small cup of yogurt and forced herself to eat it by taking a small spoon and reluctantly shoving dangerously small bites into her mouth.

After cleaning up the kitchen, she was changing into a sweater and pajama pants when she heard a knock at the door. Oh my god. Aaron was finally back.

She ran to the front door and frantically opened it. “Aaron?” her face was lit up but suddenly fell back down when she saw spencer instead.

Not exactly towards him. She was just expecting someone else.

“Key Kaylee.”

He no longer had the happy face from this morning. Instead he looked more serious. Maybe even sad if she looked hard enough.

“Spencer, what are you doing here?”

“He told me Kaylee. He told me what happened.”

Her face grew pale and her eyes widened on the edge of tears. “H- he told you about Derek?”

“Yeah. Wait- wait Derek? What are you talking about? Did something happen between you three?”

Fuck. She messed up. Clearly they were talking about two super different things.

“Um no no. Tell me what you were going to say. Please just forget what I just said.”

“No.. Kaylee what happened with Morgan? Tell me.”

“Spencer please. Just go. I can't handle this right now.” Her eyes were starting to water. She wasn’t ready to tell anyone yet. If she told Spencer he wouldn’t be friends with her anymore. And at this point he was all she had. Everyone else left. Her dad left, Aaron left, everyone eventually leaves her. 

“Kaylee please. Nobody’s telling me anything. Can I at least come in?”

“O- ok..” She reluctantly agreed.

Kaylee opened the door wider to let Spencer in. They both walked side by side to the living room. Kaylee sat on the right side of the couch. This was where she sat when she and Aaron would watch movies at night. Where was he? She missed him.

Spencer sat close to her but far enough to give her space. “Kaylee, he told me about your cheek.” He looked truly concerned.

Her eyes widened. “No Spencer. You don’t understand. He would never hurt me on purpose. He was hurt. He was mad. We were both in a bad place. It was my fault. I pushed him over the edge.” She was stammering trying to come up with excuses. She didn’t even know if she was trying to convince Spencer or herself anymore. But it was true right? She wanted to believe it. But Aaron wouldn’t even call her back. He hated her. He probably was so disgusted by her that he didn’t even want to see or hear from her anymore. She pulled her knees up and held her head down sobbing into them. She was crying from shame, from hurt, from sadness. 

Suddenly she felt warmth. Spencer reached his arms around her and pulled her into a tight hug. She was shocked but remembered that the last time she had felt safe was a long time ago. Ever since Morgan, she never let Aaron hug her or even touch her. She felt so guilty that she believed that she didn’t even deserve his love. But now, in this moment with Spencer, she had never felt more comforted. She sobbed into his shoulder as her small body shook against his. He was holding her tight and wasn’t pressing her with questions. 

She could feel his hands pressed against her back. His hands were soft and gentle, they were so different from Aaron's. Aaron's hands were big and rough. But when he held her, she felt like a feather. She loved and appreciated Spencer but oh god how she missed Aaron. She missed the way that he would squeeze her as tight as he could when they hugged, She missed when he would lean down to kiss her on the forehead, and she missed the way he would let her sit in his lap and just hold her until she fell asleep. She missed his smell of leather and cologne.

Suddenly he shifted. “Spence? What’s wrong?”

“Oh god Kaylee. How long?” His eyes were horrified.

Her sadness was now replaced with confusion. What? What did he mean? Suddenly she realised. Her sleeve had ridden up to reveal her numerous scars and still bright red cuts. She had taken the bandage off from yesterday as it was itchy and uncomfortable. 

“Oh my god. How long has this been going on?”

“I-” She could barely get any words out. She was so ashamed of herself. Her addiction was about to force her to lose another friend.

Spencer pulled her into another hug with her face in his chest. “Come here. It’s going to be ok. You know I struggled with my own addiction once?”

She sniffled and shook her head against his chest mumbling “No.”

“I understand. I get it, it’s hard to stop once you start. It feels like it’s the only thing that can take you away from reality. It’s so much better than thinking about the real world right?” He held her face up to look at him. “Until it starts to cause problems within your personal life. Then you start to lose control over your own life. It’s the one thing that you thought you had control over but then you lose it. I get it Kaylee.” She pulled back into the hug and sobbed into his chest.

After she pulled away, she sniffled. “Thank you. I love you Spencer.” 

“And you know I love you too Kaylee. I’m your best friend, I would never want to force you to tell me anything you wouldn’t want to. But I just want you to know I’m always here for you.”

After he left she walked up to her and Aaron's bedroom where she got ready for bed. She took off her shirt and just stood there staring at her own reflection. Her scarred body. Her skinny arms and legs. She fucking hated herself. She only loved herself around Aaron. He made her feel wanted and loved. He helped her learn to love herself. But now he was gone. And she didn’t know if he was coming back. She gathered her hair into a messy bun and brushed her teeth. She put on one of Aaron’s dress shirts that smelled awfully like him. Kaylee walked over to Aaron’s side of the bed and curled up into the blanket that also smelled just like him. A single tear fell before she fell asleep with a small yawn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will I ever not end a chapter with someone falling asleep? Probably not. Anyways I wanted to let anyone who is reading this know that even though I'm just a stranger, I'm always willing to listen if you're going through anything :) Bye guys, next chapter either tomorrow or next week!


	8. Space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New chapter with some pretty important events.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I've been really bad at updating. Once again I'm in a bad place rn. I couldn't bring myself to update but here you go. Not the best I'm sorry.

After a not so good night's sleep, Kaylee woke up and headed to the restroom. She had been repeating this process every day. Wake up, eat, sleep. Wake up, eat, sleep.

Kaylee walked to the restroom and brushed her teeth. She could barely recognize herself in the mirror. Her cheeks were getting bony and she had dark circles around her eyes. Her hair was messy and her skin was pale. “God I’m fucking pathetic.” She couldn’t even take care of herself without him. She needed him. She tried her best to get the tangles out of her hair. She took one more look at her wrists before rolling her sweater back down.

Everyday since Aaron had left, she had been trying to fight the urge to cut again. She knew he would be so disappointed in her once he got back. The small sliver of hope she had of him coming back and seeing her wrists without any fresh scars and telling her how proud he was of her was the only thing keeping her from slicing her arms and legs again.

Walking down the magnificent set of stairs, she went to the living room leading her to find Aaron asleep on the couch. “Aaron?” He was in a bit of a curled up position since he was a bit longer than the couch. He had a thin blanket draped over himself.

He was laying so peacefully with his eyes closed still in the same clothes from four nights ago. He lay flat on the couch with his left arm draping off. Kaylee walked over carefully and gently shook his shoulder. “Aaron.” 

Aaron slowly opened his eyes and saw her. His eyes widened and he sprang up pulling Kaylee into a big hug. Her face was buried in his shoulder and she could smell his faded cologne. Tears pricked at her eyes. “Oh my god Kaylee. I’ve missed you so much you don’t understand.” They pulled apart and he finally took in her face. His eyes widened in terror and worry as he saw her. She looked so entirely different. He winced as he saw the gash on her cheek that still wasn’t healed. His fingers traced her jaw and he looked into her eyes. “I’m sorry Kaylee. Please just let me explain myself. I slept on the couch when I got back last night. I didn’t know how you would’ve felt if I had slept with you.”

“Please don’t Aaron. I understand.”

“No. You don’t. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you, that was the last thing I wanted to do. You’re supposed to feel safe here. You’re not supposed to be scared.” 

“I do,” she smiled, “Please just hold me, that’s all I need right now.”

She climbed into his lap as he wrapped his arms all the way around her. She snuggled into him and rested her head on his chest. She had missed him so much. Aaron couldn’t help but stare at her legs that were now pulled up into her own chest. He knew that it wasn’t his fault but he knew he could’ve done something to prevent it. He should've seen the signs when she stopped coming to the office, when she could barely touch him and when she stopped coming outside for dinner. He thought that she was just tired and maybe didn’t like spending all her time with him. He should’ve known that instead, she was in so much pain. So much pain that she tried taking her own life.

“Kaylee? Do you think we can talk about what happened?” Aaron looked down to see her asleep. Her facial features were now relaxed. Her eyelids were slightly twitching and her lips were slightly curved at the tips. He kissed her on the forehead and brought her to the bedroom where he lay her down gently. He pulled the blanket over her and walked to the other side of the bed to lay down next to her. As he lay down, she snuggled into his arms. 

“Goodnight hun.” Aaron drifted off to sleep holding Kaylee.

The next morning, Aaron woke up before Kaylee. He woke up to find her still fast asleep. She was quietly breathing and since he didn’t want to wake her, he carefully slid his arms off of her and got up to the bathroom. Since there wasn’t a new case today, he changed from his four-day old clothes into pajama pants and a light grey t-shirt. After brushing his teeth and combing his hair, he heard rustling come from the bedroom where he figured Kaylee had woken up. 

Climbing back into bed with her, she layed in his lap while he stroked her hair. “Kaylee? Do you want to talk about what happened now?” He felt her nodding in his lap before she sat up. “Baby, why did you do it? You know you could’ve told me about what was going on. I wouldn’t have looked at you differently.”

“I- I was so tired Aaron. I was just so tired.” she couldn’t even look him in the eyes right now.

“Tired of what?”

“Don’t you get it Aaron? I was so tired of waking up every day scared. Not knowing if he was going to come over or not. I was so fucking tired of living. I wanted to die. God Aaron, why didn’t you let me? Why didn’t you just let me die! I had no more reasons to live!” Kaylee was now yelling at him. She knew this wasn’t his fault but she was feeling every emotion at once right now. She didn’t know how to handle this. She didn’t want to yell at Aaron.

“Please. Please don’t say that. Wasn’t my love enough for you?” Aaron’s voice was broken and he gathered her small hands in his and kissed them. How could he show her she was loved? He still didn’t know what to do. “You- you could’ve told me what was going on and how you were feeling..”

“And what would you have done Aaron? It already happened. He had already r- raped me countless times. The damage is done. J- just leave it.” She got out of the bed and headed to the restroom where she locked the door. She slumped to the floor and tears started rolling out of her eyes. She sobbed into her hand not wanting Aaron to hear. 

Why did she yell at him? She knew that none of this was his fault. This was already so hard on him and now she had gone and made the situation even worse. That’s what she does. She fucks everything up. That’s probably why everyone leaves. Aaron is going to leave her soon. Then Spencer. Everyone will leave until she’s all alone. But maybe that’s what she deserved.

“Honey? Kaylee..?” Aaron knocked on the door. She had been in there way too long even after they had just got into an argument. It was dead silent in the restroom. “Kaylee? Are you okay?” He knocked once more. All he needed was some reassurance that she was fine.

“I’m ok Aaron. I- I just need the space right now.” Kaylee fought her hardest to keep her voice strong and steady. If she pushed him away enough, then she wouldn’t be able to hurt him anymore. 

“Alright.. you know I’m always here for you right?” It sounded cliche but it was the only thing he could muster up. 

“Yes I know..” She sniffled and wiped her tears off her sodden cheek. 

Walking out of the bathroom and downstairs, Kaylee found Aaron downstairs on the couch. 

“Aaron? I’m sorry. I- I think I’m going to be heading out for a while.” Kaylee walked over to him with puffy eyes and walked towards the front door with her head down.

“Oh ok.. stay safe. Kaylee? I love you. How long will you be gone? Where are you going?” Aaron stood up and hoped she would at least say it back.

“I love you too. I will be. Um. I don’t know yet. I just need some distance right now.” And she walked out of the door with no destination. She just needed to get out. She needed to think. 

Without even realising it, she had walked to a shitty looking motel. Inside, the pale yellow wallpaper and slight smell reminded her of her home. And her mom. Why was she still thinking about her mom? This was the same lady who used to beat her. Left her with bruises and cuts all over her body. Left her alone at home at too young of an age to have to learn how to make her own meals. That didn’t matter right now. The only thing she could think of was when her mother would hold her. The slight faded smell of cigarettes that constantly hung to her clothes, the way her hair was up in a bun because her hair was barely taken care of. That was her mother. Whatever. Kaylee paid for a room on the second floor with the credit card Aaron had given her and walked up all alone. She hadn’t brought any clothes with her. Looking around, she opened the minifridge and found a bottle of random alcohol. It didn’t matter to her.

Kaylee took a giant swig and plopped down on the musty bed. One sip led to another which only led to another. By the time she looked out the window, it was dark and she had no more alcohol left. 

“Shit.” Kaylee walked outside clumsily. She had barely had alcohol; and it was usually only when Aaron was around her. She knew it wasn’t safe to be out here at night. She didn’t care. Kaylee leaned on the railing and took in the cool air. After however long she was outside, Kaylee headed back into her room. Settling down in the bed, she pulled the covers over herself and imagined it was Aaron keeping her warm instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. Leave kudos or comments if you want :)


	9. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What is going to happen once Kaylee is at the motel?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I've been super bad at updating. I'm swamped with work and personal issues. But this is probably the last chapter of this work. I had a lot more chapters planned out in the beginning but honestly i've lost all motivation for this.

Aaron woke up alone in bed again. One whole day since he’d last seen Kaylee. One whole since she had told him she needed space. He gave her enough space right? He didn’t want to be the clingy jealous boyfriend but where was she? He pulled out his phone and frantically sent a series of texts. 

Kaylee where are you?

Please. I’m worried.

Kaylee?

Babe?

I understand if you don't want to talk.

I just need one reply.

Please.

Please?

I’m serious.

I’m sorry.

Looking at the bright glow of his phone in the pitch black bedroom, he realised it was 6:00 AM. Shit. He knew she was never a morning person. Now he just looked desperate. But he was! How else would he know she was safe? He hoped Penelope would call soon with news of a new case. Anything would help distract him right now. 

Shit. What if she was with Spencer right now? He knew they had gotten close over time. Spencer was probably there for her when he was gone. No. No. He shouldn’t be jealous. But he can’t help it. Spencer’s younger and they seem to have more in common. Kaylee deserves someone who can actually tell when she’s sad and going through a hard time. Aaron slammed his phone onto the small bedside table. He was frustrated now. Walking out of bed and stomping downstairs, he opened the fridge grimacing at the light glow of the fridge lights in contrast to the house with no lights on.

He searched around the fridge for at least one decent thing to eat. Nothing. He walked upstairs empty handed and lay back in the bed drowning himself in the covers. 

Kaylee woke up in the musty motel room. What time was it? God her head was pounding. How much did she drink last night? She sat up and blindly reached across the bed for her phone. It was dead. How the hell was she supposed to get home now? She got up and headed to the restroom. What a mess. And god her arm was aching. It’s like there was a magnet in there just pulling her. Urging her to give herself just a few more cuts. No. She had to fight it, she convinced herself that even though the pain would relieve her for an hour or two, nothing could really fill the black pit she felt inside of her stomach. 

But it was still pulling her towards the idea. Maybe a few cuts wouldn’t be too bad? Nobody would notice it. No, she needs Aaron. All she can think about right now is cutting and Aaron. Oh how she’s missing him right now. And she’d pick Aaron over cutting. How is she supposed to reach him? She doesn’t exactly know the way back and her phone is dead.

Kaylee walked out of the room and downstairs to the front office where she asked if they had a charger.

“Hi, uh excuse me?” Kaylee tried to get the attention of the old woman at the front desk.

“Hello sweetheart, what can I do for you?” The lady stated sweetly.

“Uh do you maybe have a charger I could use? My phone is dead.” 

“Yep! Let me get one from the back.” The woman walked painfully slowly. All Kaylee wanted to do was call someone. Let them know where she was. Handing her the charger, Kaylee quickly thanked the woman and headed back up to her motel room.

After waiting a few moments for her phone to turn back on, Kaylee opened up her phone. Suddenly seeing all his texts, she felt guilty. If she had known he was this worried she wouldn’t have left. No. She had to leave. But she was coming back so it was fine right? She hesitated dialing Aaron’s number. Would he really want to just stop everything just to come get her? He had already done so much for her and she just left without even letting him know where she was.

Her hand shakily pressed the dial button and brought the phone up to her ear, hearing the same ringing tone over and over. “Oh.. please answer.” She muttered to herself. She perked up in attention when she suddenly heard his voice through the phone.

“Hello? Kaylee. Where are you? I’ve been worried-”

“Aaron. I’m fine, uh do you think you could pick me up? I can share my location with you?”

“Alright. Can we please talk when I get there?”

“Yes i’m sorry. I shouldn't have left.” She hung up the call. 

Thirty minutes later when Aaron knocked on the door of the room, Kaylee opened it and gave a sigh of relief. She sprang up into his arms and buried her face in his neck; taking in his cologne that he almost always wore. She felt his large hands on her back pulling her closer. They both released each other and walked into the room where they sat on the edge of the bed.

“Are you ready to talk Kaylee? And please. Don’t shut me out” Aaron sighed with his hands on his knees.

“I don’t know Aaron. That’s the problem. I don’t know what’s fucking happening to me and it scares me. It’s like, it’s like I barely recognize myself anymore.” She buried her face in her hands. Aaron reached out for her hands and engulfed them in his own. 

“Baby, I’m suggesting this to you because I love you. I-I think you need help. Professional help.”

She immediately pulled her hands away from him, “What? Y-you want to send me away? Oh god. I was wrong. I-I thought t-that you loved me!” Her eyes were watering. Was she really this broken? Aaron didn’t want her anymore?

“Honey I do love you. I’m not sending you away. I was thinking we could get you a therapist. If you’re okay with that. if not, I’ll try my best to help you. You’ve been through so much in such little time. But I think that this will benefit you. Please. Consider it?”

“Yes. I’ll do it.” Kaylee agreed.

Aaron was pleasantly surprised. “Thank you baby.”

“I trust you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. In the future if I feel like it, I might still update this but idk. Again thanks for reading <3 Hopefully the endng wasn't too bad. I'm also working on two other works so if you're subscribed to me, you'll see them in the future!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I've never written before, so i'm sorry if some things are a little splotchy or bad. Just lmk if there's anything that concerns you! Again, thanks for reading! :) <3


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